"Now THAT'S a lame excuse!"

today I was in Big bux and I saw our local journalist.  She was by herself so I said:

"You are more then welcome to join me if you like"

she replied:

"I would but I have bills to pay!"

I thought, now that is one of the most lame excuses I ever heard.  It reminded me of when I had a blind date in Hampden (Baltimore) at a pizza shop.

the guy wasn't there but 5 minutes when he said: "I've gotta go, I think I left my oven on!"

AZ republic

8/2011

article entitled

"Boom Times for Pawnshops" (san francisco)

"Just a few blocks from where sunny tourists ride cable cars past colorful shops, life turns gray.   Chris needs money for groceries."

(I can't find the rest of the article, having a hard time concentrating in this noisy library) Anywho, I've used pawn shops myself for survival money. Specifically I recall using the one in Hampden, MD on 36th st. I recall selling my precious 45 record collection for food money.

"The Man who carries 7 purses"

Lunch with my local drug dealer!

I was at the Hampden mall/offices for a doctor's appt. I'm down to my last 10 dollars. After finishing  I proceed to the 4th floor elevator. I see what appears to be a very high man carrying 7 purses!

  He asks me "How you doon?"

"I'm hangin' in there" I reply.

"I'm tryin' to hang in there too" he responded.

He continued to chat with me on the elevator.

Elana-"Selling purses?"

"dealer"-"Well, I'm" tron" to but I'm really not supposed to be here at all" "You do what chu got to do. You know what I mean?"

Elana-"I know exactly what you mean"

"dealer" "I gots some Michael Jackson t shirts dat I'm sellin' too"

Elana-"That's really cool. I'd love to see the Jackson shirts. My first concert  was Jackson 5. I don't have any money, in fact the money I'm using to buy my hot dog was donated to me. My doctor wants me to eat so he gave me 10 bucks"

"dealer" "Yeah I'll show you the shirts but I have to be careful"

Elana-"Just sit with me while I eat my hot dog, I'm sure you won't get in trouble for showing the t shirts if you're sitting with me."

"dealer" "That sounds good"

He takes the tshirts out of the purses. Some are really beautiful and I'd buy one if I could. But I gotta wonder, where he "gets his goods?"

Elana-"Those shirts are absolutely beautiful." "Are you having any luck with sales?"

"dealer" "Not a lot.....  I gotta supplement my work ya know. I do a little bit of dealin. "Um just being honest which you."

Elana_"What do you sell?"

(He names multiple drugs. I don't know much about drugs, but I'm learning. His arms are covered with bad scars. He looks like he was totally dismembered and then put back together again.

Elana-"So, what are dealers bringin' in these days?"

"Man, I'm making 8k a month. But I'm "tron" to get out of it"

E-"What happened to you. Why all the scars?"

Man-"Well, I ingested a ca-cock-tion of drugs and then passed out in Dru Hill for 3 days when they found me"

E-"What a miracle that you're still alive!"

Man-"Sure is, we all gots our time and god didn't want me to go yet"

E-"Sounds like you're glad you lived!"

Man-"Sure am." My son is upstairs at the doctor and my daughter works in this bldg."

E-"You've got family. Sounds like you have alot of reason to live. A purpose"

Man-"I just turned 55 the other day!"

E-"Happy birthday! I just turned 46!"

Man-"You a gemini?"

E-"Cancer"

Man-"I guess that's why we hit it off so well, we both cancers!"

E-"I'm sure that's it!"

Man-"Well, I gotta get goin now, it was great to meet you!"

E-"you too, and I wish you the best with everything!"

DESPERATE FOR SHELTER/PART 2 (11/11/95)

At Eric's* place:

It's noon. What a day this was. I didn't go out until 1-1:30 because I was trying to make emergency arrangements to get out of here before I get evicted using Eric's* landline.   I did find something short term.

I left my "room" after an 18 hour stint because I was starving. Eric was in a good mood thank god because it was his Sabbath. So he apologized for the way he has been treating me and says he'll be better by Monday. He says he hopes I still live here then.

I contacted a progressive church that I don't attend and told the pastor I was desperate for a safe place to live. It took her a few days of research but she found a member of the church named Debbie* who will put me up for 200 a month. Unfortunately, Debbie lives within city limits in Hampden.
Mandy told the pastor at the church that she'd put me up again when he called her for a reference.

I'm practically paralyzed by all of this stress. Good night. Tonight and today was 68 and sunny in the morning, showers and high winds in the afternoon, tornadoes, then a snowstorm at night! I'm thankful that I'm warm, but I feel like a prisoner.

11/14/95

Debbie comes to get me, Eric sees the whole thing happening, we tell him nothing, I grab as much of my stuff as possible while he questions us, we hurry and leave for her place in Hampden.

11/15/95

1:30 a.m.

Yesterday I did nothing BUT commute. I had to go to Eric's to return his mother's clothing. I took the route 27 bus  from Hampden to Rogers Station then on to the Owings Mills Metro Station. That was a long, cold wet wait but the ride itself was pleasant as we went through Mt. Washington, Cross Keys, then on to Rogers Station.

As we began to approach Rogers Station it became less pleasant. The people who ride public transit for the most part are poor and look miserable. Baltimore is even more depressing then Lafayette, just like Sheryl feared might be the case. (Sheryl was my neighbor in Laf. and warned me against coming to Baltimore for a "better life")

What's the point in applying for work as a social worker right now, I can't even barely even think straight.   I'll have to job hunt while I'm staying here at Debbie's, since she will be expecting me to show a real effort to get back on my feet.

Today, I sat on the ground (there are no chairs) in the Owings Mills Subway Station waiting for my friend Mandy to pick me up. I heard one of the passengers telling her friend that she carries an umbrella solely as a weapon. Then at Rogers Station a man comes up to another man who was sitting next to me and says: "DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE "YO GIRL" THAT WAS STABBED AND RAPED AND HAD HER EYEBALLS POPPED OUT OVER ON BELVEDERE?"

"YEAH, IT WAS A 19 YEAR OLD WHITE BOY WHO DID THAT TO HER!" (author's note: after 10 years of using b-more's public transit, i believe the loud reference to "white boy" is an attempt to make me feel intimidated) The man went on to say that the wife of the murdered man has filed assault charges against the white boy.

NEGATIVE! CRIME, CRIME, CRIME! It's brought up within the first 5 minutes of every conversation I've ever been in since I've arrived in Baltimore. I'm thinking more and more seriously all of the time about trying to move back to Australia.

THERE HAVE GOT TO BE PLACES OUT THERE THAT AREN'T SPIRITUALLY DEAD!

WHERE?!

Life is such a  DRAG!