Saturday, July 26, 2014

'The Singing Doctor' Croons to Newborns in the Delivery Room

singing to the babies I nannyed for was always one of my fave parts of the job.  When I was working in the preschools we were always singing!  So, this story made me very happy!

What's Wrong with People? Part 2

this really resonated with me.  In 7th grade I was real good friends with Angela* who lived below me in the apts.  One day not only did she stop talking to me, she told all the kids in my building to stay away from me.  This went on for 2 years.  She had a gang of girls that would follow me home.  When I was home, Angela* would bang the broom on her ceiling for hours, especially when I played piano.  I was scared to go out, but I was also horrified to be home too.  Mother refused to move us away and the cops wouldn't do anything.  This was 1976

TV Commercial - Febreze Fabric Refresher - Angela's Cat - Nose Blind - B...

I first saw this wonderful commercial 3 weeks ago when a guy gave me a ride and his car smelled horrible!  Dogs? I said.  he said yup!  I opend up the window as quickly as I could.  Most animals owners homes stink also.  Just one more reason to not go into a home with a dog or a cat.  that leaves out pretty much everybody doesn't it?


Our society cares more about protecting animals then it does about protecting humans.

Outlaw Prophet: Warren Jeffs - Brent Ellis

He did an amazing job playing Jeffs.  But I was absolutely disgusted throughout the movie seeing the way the females were treated.  So glad he got caught.  Incredulous to think that he still has 10k followers!

Escape From Polygamy - FULL MOVIE

I saw t his for the 2nd time last night and wondered whether or not there is a joelina and ryder barlow in real life.  They are both beauties and I loved watching t heir romance play out.  I have read Elyssa Walls bio a few years ago.  The conditions for women were deplorable and I was glad to hear that Warren Jeffs made a suicide attempt in prison.  Sure was unrealistic that Joelina survived a hanging and Ryder survived being shot?!

"Do you believe in curses?"

I feel like I'm under a curse, but not just one or two areas of life but all of them.  O.K. let's just look at one area of life.

Conferences and trips.

Today, the leader of a local free conference texted me to tell me that it is at 1 p.m.  I showed up at one and the room was essentially sealed off.  The newspaper stated that t he conference starts at 11 a.m.  I asked the leader for clarification and he said 1!

So, I stayed for an hour, but I was mad. The stuff that was talked about built upon what was talked about the first 2 hours.  The room was dark and the acoustics were so bad that if I wasn't reading his lips I didn't understand him at all.  So, I just walked out.

Linda paid for me to go to a "health camp" in 04.  Nobody mentioned however that there is a time difference between Michigan and Indiana so I missed the kick off dinner which was very important.

In 99, I drove to Rehobeth to meet with the Sierra Club.  I missed the one big shared meal because of this:

there were no posted speed limit signs.  So, when I saw a cop and that he was doing 65 I reasoned that must be the speed limit.  He pulled me over told me I was speeding and got held up for nearly an hour.

In 2010 I went to the adoption conference.  There was a big kick off dance and dinner, but the leader gave me the wrong hotel, so I lost my big chance to meet the other attendees.  Have I made my point?

Friday, July 18, 2014

"Just hired at the Nature Company/looking back at 8/3/97"

Folks you wouldn't believe what happened in the morning BEFORE I even got to my first day of work!  But for this entry, I will stick to the events surrounding dangerous Baltimore life and retail hell.



As soon as I show up at Nature Company, Jen , a new employee and myself get "crammed" into this tiny back room with the training video just a coupla inches from our faces! 

I feel a panic attack coming on and my chest is tightening.  We're back there alone for 20 minutes or so.  We are then led to a back room where we see but are not introduced to:  Ross,  the manager from Brooklyn. 

Ross gets this phone call from GOD KNOWS WHO and he says:


When Ross realized I heard him he dramatically covered his mouth!  I  asked him about the overheard conversation.  He said:

"There is so much theft at this store that I have to go to court two to three times a week where I am constantly putting people in jail!"  He went on to say that he always goes for maximum sentencing!  As a result the thieves turn around and make death threats to him.

How ironic!  Here I am at the Nature Company which is supposed to be supporting all of this good stuff and have good values!

I asked questions about whether we are at risk of being robbed at gunpoint by taking this job.  He replied:


He went on to say: "We need to be prepared to die at any moment!

(Working these god damned $5.00 hour retail jobs isn't much different then being in the killing fields!)

He asked Jen to keep our lunch break limited to 30 minutes total.  We cut our lunches short to go back and he's wasn't even there at the supply room like he said he'd be.  We waited 20 minutes.  One of the employees called him to tell him we were waiting.  (Thinking about safety it felt creepy to us that we were left alone in an isolated hallway/storage area. 

We found 2 crates to sit on otherwise we would have been left standing.  He came back but says he doesn't have the right key, and he's locked out.  he said:



I was so uncomfortable that I went looking for him and found him.  He took us to a refrigerated warehouse but we had no jackets and were not warned. He did more training but told us that we are not permitted to sit.  This is OUTRAGEOUS!

This is just like a POLICE STATE.  If you need to go to the bathroom, they frisk you and check your backpacks on the way in and the way out!  Pitiful, this level of fascism and distrust.  And all I earned today is 27.50.

This job is going to be extremely stressful I wonder how I'll manage the stress.

"neighbor smoking inside apt. again"

Even though the odds are stacked against me in many regards, I made an appt. for vocational rehabilitation.  In theory they help disabled people find work.  Neither John (a Maryland therapist) nor myself, know of one single person that voc rehab ever got a job for.

Nonetheless, on the way there, I had sharp chest pain.  I had to "do a u turn" and head for urgent care.  I was diagnosed, yet again, with pleurisy, a lung illness typically reserved for smokers.  This is about the 3rd time I've had it.

What's so scary is that even if I do move again, I can't afford to live in a non smoking complex.  Can't afford not to either!

Definitely feel trapped, it's scary.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

JAMES BROWN Sex Machine 1971

JAMES BROWN Get On The Good Foot & Please Please Please (BBC) 2003

I can really identify with him needing to leave the funky wild dancing to the young hot ones.  Because it kills me that I am too crippled up 2 dance the way I used  2!  this is an extremely entertaining video

James Brown - Get up offa that thing- Live (HQ)

Mr. Tambourine Man (Live at the Newport Folk Festival. 1964)

CNN: Child sex slaves in America

I was trying t find you the sex slaves documentary episode called: sex slaves polk county.

The Hunt with John Walsh Ep. 1 Trailer

Incredible.  His family was so so beautiful, and ironically he is a very handsome man.  I hope they catch him. (shane miller)

Gloria Killian*

I have opposed the death penalty ever since my mid twenties when I learned about the subject; and you may be also after u c this

Sex and the Single Girl (1964) - Henry Fonda - Lauren Bacall -Dance

saw most of this movie on tcm the other day.  so cute!

The Power of Together - Copilots - Presented by Petco

despite the way I personally feel about our pet obsessed culture, this is one damn good ad!

Heartsongs: A Tribute to Dolly!

wow wynonah!  very impressive!  (wynonah was 17 when I met her at common ground on the hill)

Wynonah Dove "FAITHFULLY"

Wynonah Dove's TMI Vlog: Make An Impact!

this is the lady I befriended at common ground on the hill in 1997.  this is my first time "seeing" her again!  she has the same issues on her heart and mind as I have had................................

"Health Update"

Well, I've lost 35 lbs in the last year so happy about that.  I'd be lying if I said I feel better because I don't.  However, I can walk fast some days and / or certain times of the day.  That seems so contradictory because when my feet hit the floor in the a.m.  I really need a cane to safely stand and walk to the bathroom.  My feet don't work right and I can't keep my balance and those first few moves are unbearable.

Knowing that a normal life span for me would be about 82, and that for 31 more years I am going to wake up and feel excruciating pain regardless of meds, well it's a huge pill to swallow!

I was having horrible hot flashes, but the doc started me on Neurontin and I haven't had a hot flash since.  It seems the Neurontin has also helped with the nerve pain.

Still largely homebound, but I do have some things I'm looking forward to.  Like the mountain town camera club meeting.  ;)

Having daily headaches.  maybe if I use the neti pot it will kill the sinus infection and hopeful stop the headaches.  (h/a)

They keep trying me on sleep meds and I've been allergic to all of them, so i'm back on Seroquel for sleep.  What that means is that sometimes I only sleep an hour a night but it's a little better then nothing.

"Panhandlers, left right and center"

There are panhandlers at every grocery store and many corners.  It's really a lot.  If you feel like helping, do this.

After you have completed your shopping trip, but one refrigerated bottle of water, store brand or generic.

As your pulling out of the lot, give them the refrigerated water.  Where I live water is so important and many homeless don't carry any.

They are very grateful, and you don't have to worry that the money you gave them will go to drugs, alcohol or cigarettes!

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

We Got Tonight - Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers live 1985

Dolly Parton - In The Pines on The Dolly Show with her family 1976/77

In The Pines ( Atkinson Family)

A girl named Wynonah taught me this song at Common Ground on the hill in the 1997.  I just found out that she now stars on 2 shows and is a professional Dolly Parton Impersonator!

Marvin Gaye - Lets get it on

Planet Rock The Story Of Hip Hop And The Crack Generation

Show And Tell - Al Wilson (1973)

Billy Paul - Me And Mrs. Jones (1972)

I grew up with this song.  "mother's" best friend was edie who is white.  she was happily married to wayland who is black.  I surmise they married in the 40's or as soon as inter-racial marriage became legal in Maryland.  We were in Randallstown, Maryland and my neighborhood at that time was very diverse.  In Kings Park Estates we had the house until 1975, and in that neighborhood the word diverse took on a very positive connotation.  I saw no color.

Billy Paul. Me And Mrs Jones. Original Video

I Mind Very Much If You Smoke/American Lung Assn PSA 1973

"Peaceful conflict resolution"

Polka dot people=a particular ethnic group in Baltimore I found did not respond well to peaceful conflict resolution.

Now to the story.  I stopped using my conflict resolution skills with the polka dot people in Baltimore because overall I found they were not receptive to that.

But, in nearly ever single apt I have lived in (as well as group houses) I have become very sick from smokers in the building.

Where I live now people are not allowed to smoke.  But why does my apt. always smell foul.  Why is my nose closing off and why do I need to use my inhaler so often?

I tried something that I did not expect to bare fruit.  I tried using my conflict resolution skills.

Larry* was inside his apt. with the front door open.  I called in and asked him if he could come out just for a moment.

(We have had only one conversation in 15 months)

He said: "Sure I'll b right there"

me-"I was wondering Larry, is there any chance that u smoke inside?"

him-"Sometimes I do" he said.

(i'm thinking since he is home all day, "sometimes" could be one out of every 3 cigarettes!")

Before I could say an thing he said: "Why, are you smelling smoke up there?"

me_"Well, I'm not going to blame you, but I am having trouble breathing and my place smells bad.  We do after all share the same building"

him-"Consider it DONE!" "I promise to never smoke again indoors!"

me-"I never want to approach anyone with a "spirit of blame!"

Reader, I'm telling you my apt. smells fresh and clean, I don't have to use my inhaler as often, and I probably will not get as many disabling headaches.


"Been awake for about 2 weeks"

The old sleep med has stopped working.  Last night I found an older sleep med and tried it.  Took 25 mg.  If not asleep in an hour, I took another 25, after an hour I'm still not asleep.  Took 75 and at least slept a couple of hours.  Weak and in a great deal of pain.  Pretty low functioning.

"Weather is NOT small talk in this town"

When I it began to rain 15 min. ago I ducked into library.  After 10 minutes the library lot is badly flooded with nearly 3 inches of hail covering the streets and the cars.  It looks like ice but is that possible above 32 degrees.  It's absolutely beautiful but treacherous for driver and pedestrians!

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Chicago - Feelin' Stronger Everyday (Live in studio 1973) HQ Audio

Wildflower - Skylark (STEREO)

Containment on Northern Arizona Wildfire Inches Up

"this evenings events were pretty good"

I just received my birthday card in the mail from david, he gave me 20 bucks.  I also received an even more generous gift as well today, which I expect will raise my quality of life and bring more joy.

David sent 2 cards.  One was featuring the cast of wizard of oz which I loved because I have sung the music from it quite a bit.

also, he sent a card of a little girl trying to keep boulders from falling on her.  He said when he saw the card he thought about what life is like for me...........................good choice!

"At the orthopedist"

So  far we are exploring sources of tailbone and spine pain, and left and right shoulder and neck pain.

What I know is that there are bone spurs on the right shoulder, the left shoulder there is soft tissue damage only

the tailbone xray shows that the accidents didn't cause any structural damage.  they want me to buy that ring to sit on.

there was a scene on the little couple where he gives jen a ring for her 40th birthday and she yells emphatically: I DON'T NEED THIS!

She thinks and hopes that physical therapy will help.  we shall see.