Friday, May 9, 2014

"When I "like" or "share" a commercial with you"

I want to make it clear that I share commercials with you it's solely because I enjoyed the commercial.  In 99% of the cases I have no intention of actually trying out the product in order to determine whether or not the commercial was truthful or not.

Looking back at 4/28/2006

nannying for mia today

Whenever I'm at work a large dog barks non stop for up to 5 hours!   The dog lives in the very next apt.  I called animal control who stated that they are going to send the owners a letter.    when I called the management office, they gave me the same song and dance that you always hear when you live in an apt. "You CHOSE to live with dogs!"

I replied: "So you aren't going to help me?"

"Our hands are tied" she said.


Mia was tired by 3.  I gave her a bottle and she fell asleep in my arms.  After 15 minutes I put her in her crib.  She cried for 22 minutes.  I "ferberized" her a technique I learned on the mommy channel.  You go in their room every 5 minutes but don't pick them up.  that ferberizes them.  After 22 minutes of crying, I picked her up and she slept in my arms for 10 minutes.  I put her in her crib at 4 and she cried for 3 minutes.  It's  4:10 p.m. and she is sleeping.  I am very tense in my chest because the dog is still barking. 

We went out for a while and when we got back "Fernando" the dad was home.  He knows very little English.  He asked me if I drink beer or Jack Daniels?!

I said: "I can't afford to drink and I'm not going to get baracho at work! (drunk!)  I spoke mostly in Spanish.


nannying on 5/3

Unfortunately Fernando has a crush on me.  Talk about awkward.  He said "I like you, don't tell my wife!"

I played dumb and said "But no es romantico!" (it's not romantic love) "Of course you like me, I love your daughter!"

He said he actually doesn't go to work on Fridays he just goes out and plays so that I can make some money.

He went on to ask me if I want whiskey!  He thought is was very strange that I said no.  I asked him if he drinks and drives?  He said "Yes, I've never had a problem!"

I said "I hope Mia isn't in the car when you drink"  He said "She isn't"

When I rested my hand on my head he said:


"Yes" I said


"yes! I'm sure why do you ask?!"

"Because you put your hand on your head!"

(Oh boy this man is making me very uncomfortable. 

He said: "When I go to parties the women always ask me if I am married!"

He repled to them "Yes, but I'm Mexican"

(easy to read behind the lines this man will have no problem with cheating on his wife)


If you wake up in the morning and all you want to do is write, then you are a writer.

If ou wake up in the morning and all you want to do is sing then YOU ARE A SINGER!


Whoopie Goldberg Sister Act 2

Oh Happy Day Sister Act 2


"My new acquaintance tells me something very meaningful"

When I was describing my current living situation yesterday to my new acquaintance he responded with a comment that felt profound and meaningful.


He was referring to my current apt. and having a steady monthly income.  The reason it felt so profound is that this really is the first time since 93 that my situation would appear stable to anyone.
I feel so proud of this because it did take me 20 YEARS to find a safe affordable situation that is quiet enough that I can actually think and get some sleep.................................................

I will plan very carefully so as to seriously decrease any chances of becoming homeless in the future, as I can't stay in mountain town for the long haul, primarily because I can't take the long harsh winters.

"Pain "management"

As you know there are always many hoops to jump through.  With my current as well as my last apt. you can be evicted if you are caught drinking, even a glass of wine.  Currently even though I have the medical marijuana card, there are 2 places that are not permitting me to use it; the pain management office and one individual who is forbidding me to use it if I want her help with something.

I believe that the mmj (med. marijuana) is somewhat safer then  pain meds but oh well.  The pain management nurse agreed to raise my dose last week which I think will help a lot, yet there is still a great deal of pain, enough that most days I can't stay out for more then 4 or 5 hours.

As I recently blogged about, I went to physical therapy to get a tens unit which can help a lot with pain management.  She said there is no guarantte that medicare will pay for this and if they don't you have to mail it back.

The tens is a good distraction from pain temporarily, however medicare called me to tell me they wojn't pay for it because they paid for one in 09.

When I was forced to flee the violent situation I was in in 4/10 and 4/11 I was forced to leave everything behind that had not already been destroyed or stolen.  One of those things was the tens unit.

At some point I may do pool therapy (if water is very warm) medicare will pay every penny of that and swimming is my favorite sport.

At this point I haven't found any relief from the neuropathy which is very severe and disrupts my sleep.

Thursday, May 8, 2014

'My Five Wives': A Different Look at Modern Polygamy

Interesting stuff.  I have no criticisms of this life style!  How can I criticize a big loving family when I've never experienced belonging to a family myself!  It's interesting that none of the teen kids think they will do plural marriage themselves.  ;)  I think in many regards dad seems very progressive and open minded and the wifes are terrific!

"Make sure you interview THEM as well"

Looking back at 4/2001.  I have been on a series of shocking interviews but lately I think this one takes the cake.

I am interviewing to work as a social worker , in Baltimore city and I'll have one client.  My journal entry doesn't include the name of the agency and I can't recall why there is only one client.   Nonetheless there is plenty interesting about this memorable interviews.

The man who is interviewing me is African American.  He cannot remember the name of my potential client!  His eyes are yellowed , he's incoherent and either high or drunk I can't tell which.

He says that Megan* is non verbal

she will attack you while you are driving and is violent

she is psychotic

she's schizophrenic

I did find out her correct name but he went through the interview referring to her as Janet*

I asked him if I could see some notes about her case but he said no.

The job is in one of the most dangerous sections of Baltimore City so I didn't accept it.

Friday, May 2, 2014

Styx - Lady

"Looking back at 11/3/06"

Introduction: At this time I do not own a car.  Baltimore's public transit is deadly and time consuming.



Styx "dreamer" is playing on the radio.  I'm trying to decide between taking 3 buses to Village Learning Place for Hip Hop live or go to my fifth Casey Sears concert at Borders in Timonium.  I ended up hitchhiking from Trader Joes foyer.  This time I only had to wait and as for about 15 minutes.

Usually I only go with women.  But a very good looking man smiled at me and I knew instantly that he was a safe person.  I even told him that his smile tells me he's safe, and I only hitch with men who are carrying fresh flowers ;) (he is)

He said he isn't going north but that he will run me where I need to go. 

Him-"You don't have a gun do you?"

me-"I'm not violent.  If you need to frisk me that's fine"  "I have references!"

He agreed to take me.  We had a lively discussion on the way to Borders but I was scared because he was flying! 

His bumper sticker declared that he is republican yet we enjoyed the covernsation so much that he idled for 25 minutes when we got to Borders.  He said that he knows the buses are scary.  He agreed that there's no way out once u crash financially.  He's a "big brother"  He's 27 from Napa Valley, CA.  He has ideas for publishers for my book. 

He's separated from his girlfriend, her choice, he's crushed.  We exchanged business cards and I hope we become friends.

Hairspray - Good Morning Baltimore (Official Music Video)

"Looking back at 1/3/87"

Introduction: My adoptive mother's son is living in Florida.  He has never accepted me or been nice to me ( a gross understatement)  He was born in 44.  I would find out much later in life that he hated and resented me because his bio. mother Helen, (my adoptive mother) gave HIM up for adoption to her mother, then adopted ME in 63.  He thought of me as the chosen one and him as the discarded one.  That is y he hates and resents me.

As a last ditch effort to get him to accept me I go to my adoptive father Arnold, for money so I can visit Don in Fl.


Here is the transcript from the 1/13/87 journal word for word:

I asked dad to borrow some money for the trip:

He proceeded to tell me how lousy I am and how if he called any one of my jobs they would say that I had an attitude problem.  He went on to say I don't do anyting around the house and the only person I ever think about is myself.  When I used a cuss word he slapped me across the face and stood hovering over me as if he was going to hit me again.

At this point mother comes down the steps and screams:


Father demanded that I respect him and said I can borrow the money for the tip.  He said I never confide in them or ask them for advice and demanded that things change.


author's note

When I asked don if I could come to florida he said : I don't care what you do.  When the actual day came Cullen attempted to drive me to the airport but due to the snow I never made it.  I never did end up seeing don or ever going to florida.  He died in 06 at the age of 61.

"all that's new"

There really isn't much new.  If I can get out of the house at all most days it's rather miraculous. Today I feared I wouldn't be able to get out due to waking up with chills, sweating and severe headache.  By 2 I was well enough to get out.

Maybe 2 days a week roughly I wake up wondering whether or not I belong in the e.r.  Usually I dcide against it no matter what's going on.

i.e.  yesterday I woke up with severe pain on the right side, that was only relieved by going back to sleep.

I now have a tens unit again they're kinda cool in that they distract u from the pain for the time that you are wearing it. 

Tonight is a special free event downtown which requires a lot of walking.  Today's weather is perfect but after dark it will get cold quite quickly.

Been working regularly on editing my book which is very satisfying.