Tuesday, November 13, 2007


My search for a better and normal life is still 24/7. I had a bit of an epiphany at the end of August regarding the dating chatline. The one that I mentioned in an earlier post.

The Social Security Administration awards anywhere from 200 to 700 a month if you are on disability and then rules:

"Go live on this. Don't break any rules, and don't accept any other jobs."

When I first won disability my friend Dan warned me: "Elana, don't work for at least 2 years or you might lose your benefits. Don't take any chances" I had been working for a Waldorf inspired preschool and my boss wanted me to continue, but it was too risky for me to work. This "no work" rule, did to some degree , contribute to my 2001 through 2005 episodes of homelessness.

Anyhow, you know from a previous post that I talk on a telephone chatline.  Many of the guys know that I'm looking for a barter situation of some sort or another and that I

"Gotta get outta section 8 before I become another statistic."

Backtrack.  In December 2004,  got notification that my name came to the top of the list for an Indiana subsidized apt.  I was due to be out of town for a meeting the authorities wanted me to attend.  I asked them if I should cancel the trip.  They said "No, we will have your apt. for you when you get back"  When I got back they said they gave my apt. away! 

 In May, 2005 I got notification that my name came up on the wait list of a private section 8 complex in Baltimore. I didn't qualify for any subsidized housing in Indiana but one.   I had applied at 10 of them, but was denied at all of them due to bad credit. I had no money to get back to the East Coast to take the apt. and was desperate to accept the apt., convinced that this was my ticket to a better life; up and out of poverty.

What am I going to do? I had been talking to Johnny on the chatline for months. He lives in Baltimore and hates to travel. I told him of my predicament. He's pretty socially progressive and knew I was desperate. He essentially flew 750 miles for a virtual stranger! He was kind enough to help me pay for the drive back to Baltimore. If it wasn't for him, I'd still be in Indiana and without a subsidy.

Hmmm. There are certainly more men willing to help "Damsels in Distress" then there are women. So, why not tell the guys on the chatline of my predicament? I've gotten some very colorful offers indeed. Mostly, men like the fantasy of living with a woman, but don't usually follow through. I'm trying to get enough money together to rent a car for a day so I can go look at a room for barter in PA; one of the guys from the chatline. (who doesn't do computers) I'd have to clean the house and keep this guys mother company (who lives with him. He'll share his car with me so I can job hunt. He's a definite hillbilly with a shotgun and a mother who doesn't believe in electric washing machines. At my request, he says he'll keep the shotgun locked up, so I'll feel safer. Many domestic shootings happen in a way that gun owners never anticipated, in part because of unlocked guns. (see maha.org that stands for Marylanders Against Handgun Abuse)

The fact that this guy is willing to share his car is the "carrot on the end of the stick" here. You know the prime reason my circumstances are so dismal is because I have no reliable car.

Wish me luck. Looking for a place to live is costly , especially because I'm looking out of state. By the way, my friend Johnny, the one who transported me from Indiana to Maryland, in 2005; now has his own website:


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