"Careful what you reveal on a blog"

Yes, I do know this golden rule. I can assure you, I never ever post anything without giving alot of thought to who is reading this blog and the long term implications of heavy self revelation. I only share about 5% of my life on this website for that reason.

Fibromyalgia is absolutely devastating. I've had it for at least 22 years. The official diagnosis came in 97 but I knew something was very wrong in 87 and I diagnosed myself with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. My throat is sore all of the time. I feel pins and needles in my extremities all of the time, my limbs fall asleep on a regular basis, and my joints hurt. What motivates me to get out of bed at all is-movement is very important and can distract you from the pain. It's just too excruciating to stay in bed, although the thought is tempting. My current nurse practitioner here in c.county doesn't know what to do about that. I'm in excruciating pain that never goes away. Mornings are the most devastating. The med. I'm on doesn't seem to do anything to help yet I take it religiously just in case it is helping.

I really don't know why it has never occurred to any of my Doctors to refer me to a pain clinic. When I described the pain to one of my acqaintances whose overly educated in this area he suggested that I'm probably supposed to be on the duralgesic patches which he described as "1,000 times stronger than morphine!"

Turns out there is a pain clinic here in Carroll County and I"m trying to get an appointment there. Some mornings it takes me over an hour to roll over in bed (because of temporary paralysis) and always over an hour to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. I use the wall for balance on my way to the bathroom.

There are only 3 things that I can think of that would take a pain patient's mind off of the pain. Massage, warm swimming pools or bathtubs, and the third is "well you know!"

As you can see, I've been writing for almost 3 years publicly. I'm sort of at the point where, I'm getting so practiced at this, and over time I feel less and less embarassed to reveal publicly. I also feel that the more truth I tell about my life (in my book) the greater the chance I have of selling alot of copies and getting out of poverty.................................................