Observe me

If you or social security observed me for 72 hours it would b very clear how sick I am.


I'm only getting out 10 hours a week, roughly


I had considered taking my journals entries where I write down my symptoms for 24 hours and then just putting it here, but you'd feel sorry for me.  There are a couple of things that I can't tell you about because they are too embarrassing.


You know I used to have menometrorrhagia.  I had 6 week long periods.  Would b no surprise of that contributes to my devastating weakness.  For 16 years I have never stood for more then 10 minutes.  If I have to stand in line I find a chair then tell people where my place is in the line.


Most days I cant open my eyes fully until 1 in the afternoon due to my severe burning eye pain.  So I'll have to put my hand on my lids and open them a squint just so I can get to the toilet.  Like thurs for example. 


(If I sat in a chair leaning forward for more then 5 minutes my feet and legs fall asleep. this is daily)


Thurs. airway blocked off


woke up with my skull crushed


nausea


migraine


cant' walk


all day vomiting


this is with  the usual burning, stabbing, throbbing pain.


Since I got lyme disease my nerves have been damaged.  YOur whole body is on fire.  Your feet , legs, arms are wrapped in a very tight barbed wire, while an "invisible person" has taken scissors to your nerves and veins and is cutting your feet arms hands and legs.


I told the bus driver, a friend, when he asked me how I was a few weeks ago, that "someone has taken an electric singer sewing machine and has placed my hands and arms under the needle and is just randomly sewing me up without anesthesia!"


So, If I'm awake then I'm hurtin!