Friday, October 10, 2014

"Dependent or addicted/fine line"


"They" say that folks who are living with severe chronic pain don't normally become "addicted" but do tend to be "dependent"

The pain doc doesn't give me even a fraction of what I need to live a normal life and I don't notice any pain reduction, whatsoever.  So, occasionally I've done experiments to see how many oxys I would need so that I would not feel any pain whatsoever.  I have taken 4x what is recommended and even that provides no noticeable pain reduction, all it does is put you to sleep.

I've tried taking all 3 doses as one dose.  That also puts me to sleep.  You really don't notice a high like you might expect but you might notice that for a short bit you feel "copasetic"

As a result of these "experiments" I went into withdrawal this month because I ran out of my meds early.

violent stomach cramping, nausea but can't throw up, soaked through my clothes with sweat and the entire bed was drenched.  rain out of migraine meds at the same time so splitting headache.  You rock, you shake you stand you sit you lie but you can't lie still.  It's much worse then the show "intervention" and it is horrible to go through it alone.  It can killyou and nearly did in 2011 due to fluid loss and diahrea.

You wish with all your heart that you won't wake up the next morning.

My meds got refilled today, and no more experiements.  I did convince them to give me 10 more mg a day , and perhaps I'll do one experiment, but not the sort that will cause me to run out early.  Take 2 does as one does instead of 4 doses a day............................................

You do not want WITHDRAWAL to be the thing to kill you.

Medical marijuana is safer but my card expired a few months ago.  I would need to renew my food stamps to get the lesser price for the new card.  How oft do you hear of people dying from pot.  Not too often.

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