Thursday, September 24, 2009

"You DRANK the water?!"

Here's what transpired last Wednesday night. I showed up to a free concert (held in a bookstore) 15 minutes early so I could get a good seat. When I gently opened the screen door, it sounded like it was going to come crashing down. "GEEZ!" I said, surprised. The owner seemed instantly angry with me. "What's the problem?" "Well, I thought you're door was going to come down!"

"You're early!" She said in a disapproving tone. "The band isn't even here?"

elana(-I feel like saying "Would you like me to leave?") But I don't. I say, well, yes, I am 15 minutes early.

I feel unwelcomed. I go over to the free coffee station.

owner-"Like I said. You're early. There is no coffee"

(I'm just about ready to leave) I notice that there is not one single chair set up for the concert.

elana-"Which room will the concert be held in?"

owner-"The band will be in the hallway, so you'll be able to hear anywhere in the store!"

elana(-hear? not see? And I'm the only person here? Forget it). I simply get up and leave.

I head over to a drumming circle that I've never been to before. About 25 show up. After 5 minutes one of the drummers turns out all of the lights and we're sitting in pitch black. I play a percussive frog for 10 minutes and drums for 15 and then I've had it. I don't like sitting in the pitch black. I look around for something to drink. I can't find anything, so I head for the kitchen and pour a cup of tap water. Can't be any worse then the water at my house, I think.

A few minutes later Carl looks for something to drink. He says: "I'm thirsty and there is nothing to drink"

"Well, why don't you go to the kitchen and have a cup of tap water"

Carl-"That water's no good!"

Me-"I thought it tasted good."

Carl-"you DRANK the water?" But it was tested positive for ecoli!"

Me-"What?" "And nobody warned me in advance?"

I begin imagine myself in the morning doubled over with cramps, vomiting at the emergency room.

During announcement time I announce what happened. The leader said: "Didn't you see the sign? The sign is prominently displayed: "This water has blah blah blah organism!"

sherry says: "It's positive for coliform!"

elana-"what the hell's the difference what organism it is? the point is that we should have been warned!"

jack-"That is definitely enough to dampen one's evening isn't it?"

elana-"it sure is"

leader-"elana, if you begin feeling sick, call your doctor"

marci-"eat lots of yogurt!"

jack-"that's what i call a bad day"

elana-every day's a bad day, i am not known for my good luck!"

jack-"you too ehh? I worked 30 years at a job that I hated. Me and I wife went on vacation and it rained the whole time, and when we came home the house was flooded!"

I survived, I did not get sick. My friend Faith said that I should call the health dept. to report this, she feels this church should be shut down...............................................

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