"I've been "away"

On Wednesday night I received a notice under my door stating that "there is a 25% chance that HUD will inspect your apt. on Thursday, Fri. AND Monday."

Here's how that translates. As you know the maintenance men have been robbing me blind.  (This does not negate the fact that there are others breaking in also)

  In the last few days I've discovered jewelry, toiletries, and a very valuable scrapbook missing. So, the times when I'm most likely to be robbed are between 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. Monday through Friday, when the maintenance men are on duty, however the worry is 24/7.

The worry doubles when we're (we the tenants) are told that HUD might enter our homes at any time.  It's like this. In public housing it's not really your home. You are given no privacy, no safety and a host of unrealistic rules.

  Management hasn't helped me with any of my concerns, nor have the police, the media, or my local politicians. (Therefore I decided not to vote on 9/11. It was the first time in 26 years that I didn't vote.)

On the days when HUD might come, you can't be in the shower, engage in the unthinkable, or lead any kind of a normal life at all. In general, Mon. thru Friday anyone can walk in on you..................and if you leave the house, HUD might rob you, or god knows what else....  Go through your underwear drawer? This isn't a home.

Each time I leave my house I spend up to 30 minutes hiding stuff. When the officer saw my door she agreed that the lock is worthless. I told her that we don't have permission to install a deadbolt, and even if we did, we'd be required to give the thieves (the maintenance men) a key.

About twice a month, I find a trail of blood running through the lobby, in the halls, etc.

The noise pollution is maddening.

And I must get out before I get murdered.

So, in addition to playing security guard for my own apt. over the last few days, I've been busy compiling a list of safe houses. I have one emergency shelter offer thus far.    For example, you aren't allowed to set up a second address even if where you live is deadly. If you move out, you lose your government subsidy and your chance to get a subsidy in the future. There are strong penalties to going back to work, including losing what is pretty good health insurance.

But I must do what I have to do to stay alive and increase my chances at a normal life.

Are you beginning to get a feel for the poverty trap now?