"Give the kid credit!"

Children are so amazing intelligent and intuitive. At the Hopi festival where I did not know any of the Natives, a 4 year old (morbidly obese) Hopi girl who does not know me  walked over to me and said:

"ARE YOU PLANNING TO SING?!"

"Breaking Amish 2 hour finale"

Wow!  What is so amazing about reality t.v. is that it is completely unpredictable with no Hollywood endings.

One of the first things that crosses my mind as I see these kids making huge mistakes (perjury in court, violating probation) is what I know about brain formation.  I recall that the risk and judgement centers of the brain are not fully developed until some time in the 20's.  I sometimes wonder if that's why the kids can't see that there will possibly b serious consequences for their actions.

I mean I guess I'm glad that Andrew is paying a price for violating probation, on the other hand, I wouldn't want him to get much more then the 30 days because it was a non violent offense.

I'm not clear what it is that Matt is so embarrassed about when he said "I may have done something very bad"

Most of the kids are not articulate, therefore I can't always understand what they are saying.  Perhaps they should close caption the entire show!

I was so impressed with the final party that Samuel threw.  It shocks me that for the most part at this party, bygones were bygones and the kids moved on after frequent and serious conflicts.  I have no such skills.  My relationships typically dissolve even if their is just one serious conflict.

The most emotional and poignant aspect of the show is certainly LIzzie and Hoj.  I'm shocked that they are getting married.  Hoj really is a great guy and I am so impressed at how he steps up to the plate.

Can you imagine the courage it took for Hoj to show up at the Amish community?  wow!  Thank goodness Samuel permitted him on the property.  I assume he has no way to call or text Lizzie.

My gut instinct is that they are marrying too young/on the other hand, they are very loving people and hopefully they will b able to make it work.

How courageous of Matt to go back to LA.  Felicia is a wonderful and mature girl, and Matt will b lucky if she waits for him.

Hmmm.  Also thank goodness Betsy will have a place to stay and in the long run it's good she didn't remain in the marriage.

Iva and Sam seem like a good couple, hopeful they will be able to make it work.

Samuel and Lizzie: I wish I had a sibling!  I always wished that!  How lucky they r to have each other.

Off the top of my head I can't remember what's going on with Devon.............

I will certainly miss the B.A. kids and I look forward to the flds reality show coming up in November!

"Forever the activist"

I'm hoping to leave a positive legacy here in Mountain Town.  today I called the city to describe how I nearly fell down an outdoor staircase in the main plaza because there was no after dark lighting and I couldn't see my feet or the ground.  I "voted" for reflective paint or reflective tape so nobody else falls down these stairs.  The plaza is one of the most heavily trafficked areas in Mountain Town and if the city follows through, and I see the tangible results I will feel pleased that I left a positive "footprint" on this town, and saved others from harm.

"Small town kindness small town ways"

I have $4.00 that I can allot toward food costs today.  I was on my way to a place to see if they had any kind of egg sandwich for four or less.

On the way, I saw a booth set up that was for all intents and purposes a canned food drive.  The volunteer asked me if I wanted to donate and I told her that her collection goes to folks like me.  Then I said "Oh, I know you-you have been volunteering at the soup kitchen!

She knew me and we discussed hunger issues for about 10  or 15 minutes.  She said "Don't move an inch I'll be right back"

She consults with another volunteer, comes back and hands me a $15 dollar gift certificate for what turns out to be my favorite restaurant!

;)

I thought you might enjoy that anecdote, that stuff so rarely happens.

"Recycle or Pitch it?"

At places like tenbucks*  no matter how big they make the signage people still throw their trash in the recycle bin.

I saw a cartoon recently which I just loved.  It showed a pic of a recycle and a trash bin.  In the first frame it says: "Thank you for recycling"

The second frame the guy pitches his recycling into the trash bin.

The third frame is a new sign for people who elect not to read:

"Forget about it you idiot" (addressing the guy who pitched his recycling)

Here at the library a "man" just walking up to a recycle bin and hocked a big wad of spit into the bin.

I think the cartoon was written for blokes like that one!

"Anthony Bourdain/Parts Unknown"

I believe the show appears on the travel channel but I'm not sure.  I can really relate to this guy who seems cynical with a dry humor.

He was at the wailing wall and he said (paraphrase)

"I come from 2 lines.  A jewish line and a Catholic line.  I'm an atheist.  I don't believe this makes me any less Jewish, and based on the warm welcome I'm receiving here at the Wailing Wall apparently nobody else has issue with my atheism either" (he is wearing a yarmulkah if I'm not mistaken)

I'm gonna like this show and I'm gonna like Anthony!

"Foot in mouth syndrome"

I observed the following on the bus today.  There was an old lonely man on the bus who was really only riding so he could force conversation on whoever was sitting near him.

The man really never shut up for about 20 minutes or so.  He was seated next to a woman 24 ish who was with 2 children.  A girl baby, and a girl of about 2.5.

The man kept touching the baby and making comments and forcing the preschooler to interact with him.  The 2 year old made a face like "will you please leave me alone?"

The man kept grabbing the babies arm and saying stuff like "look at those big muscles"  At one point he said

"How old is your baby son?"

mother-"My baby son is a baby daughter"  (in fact the baby was wearing pink)

man to mother-"Oh, whenever I see a Navaho baby I assume it's male!!!"

(Every day I witness multiple behaviors, sights on the bus and bus stops that shock me and this was one of them.  I do not thing the mother perceived this man as discriminatory thank goodness but I perceived him as mostly incredibly naieve and like a lot of people just looking out for his own personal agenda and that is to allay his loneliness)

"Breaking Amish"

this show can feel disjointed.  Between the ridiculous amount of commercials and the week that passes between episodes it can get dis jointed.

I thought it was so sudden that the kids returned to their hometowns.  I thought the show should have better explained why the kids were returning.  Perhaps the show could no longer afford to pay their way in Manhattan or L.A.

I certainly can't keep track of all the fights the kids have with each other and often don't know why they are mad.

So, here's the big thing.  It's been revealed who Caden's father is; and that is Hoj. WOW there sure are a lot of unpredictable twists and turns.  Where in the world did Hoj and Lizzie have sex if she was supposed to b at work at the market!  I was surprised Hoj lives in Laurel.  I was fully expec ting that she met him at the Amish Market in Cockeysville, Lutherville, Maryland; the one I used to go to.

I have never even seen a black man patronize the Amish markets.  Anywho, Hoj is a beautiful man.  How f'in insane is it that Samuel confronted him on the very day he had his child.  Samuel is out of his bloody mind.

Lizzie thinks SHE felt different growing up, imagine how Caden will feel.  I'm pleased that L's family has accepted her back and the baby.  Does Lizzie really have the legal right to take Caden away from Hoj?  Certainly he has the right to file for full or partial custody.

The scene where Hoj says I'VE NEVER SEEN CORN LIKE THIS.

Then the camera pans to Lizzie saying: "It just isn't going to work"

Author's note: I did a fair amount of cross cultural and inter-racial dating in my 30's and it does indeed have a unique set of challenges.  I can certainly see why Hoj is angry and confused.

Hmmm.  Samuel telling Lizzie that he slept with Betsy.  L is right to feel her brother is a hypocrite.  At some point or another all the kids have been hypocrites............................................

Right now there is a child screaming on the top of his lungs for 20 minutes now, so I can't concentrate anymore on writing about the other kids on the show...........

"Just one teensy weensy problem"

I have not had properly working electricity for nearly 5 months.  I have made numerous complaints to the maintenance men as well as the utility company, to no avail.  The lights flash constantly and if I try to use the microwave or d/w for example you can hear juice being sucked from appliances and the microwave will whir and even get real dark.

So, I can't read or cook or do anything normal.

If it is not resolved I will b forced to pay my October rent into escrow.  So, as has been the case for 20 years now, EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING is a grueling fight and struggle.

"The Ed Show"

I was attempting to get to the bus today and was about ready to turn off the t.v.  But when the Ed Show came on (never seen before) I knew I had to stay and watch it.

President Obama and ex President Clinton were on the Ed Show live in NYC describing Obama care.  They did a beautiful job of describing why this will benefit so many people.

Although I don't need Obama care due to being on Medicare, I was so impressed with this coverage.  You can probably find it on you tube and I encourage you to watch it!

"The Power of Music"

Perhaps it's true that most people are moved by music.  But with me, it doesn't just move me, it completely transforms me.

There are 3+ folks in Mountain Town who, whenever they see me instead of asking me:

"How are you?"

they ask:

"How are you sunshine?"

"Are you still singing?"

It absolutely does not matter how I feel physically or emotionally music but especially live music transforms me instantly, like a drug.

last Friday, I was on my way to a meeting (where no one showed) and I discovered an exceptional free outdoor live concert in the city square.

Within 20 minutes I felt CONSUMED with joy.  People ask me multiple times a day how can you have lived through so much yet still smile, sing , dance?

The only folks who are not too shy to dance are:

a 3 year old

a very drunk man

and a cowboy

There were some couples dancing but not on the stage.  One old hippie from N.M.  who was with his wife couples dancing for nearly an hour said to me: "Come on babe, let's dance"  so he motioned me toward the stage.

I can't NOT DANCE!

So, I went down there with the old hippie, then later the drunk guy and the 3 year old and danced.  One of the band members seems very pleased that I'm dancing and many folks in the audience have video cams.  It's a classic rock band that can do ABSOLUTELY ANY COVER PERFECTLY.

As far as how can a person, sing or dance or smile of they have survived so much?  There are certain things a person is born with and irrespective of what they survive those traits will always be there.

My musical soul cannot be taken away.  ;)

"911 what's your emergency?"

First I'll do the best I can to describe to you what I was feeling even though I know it is tough if not impossible to grasp.  Certainly the medical staff had no idea what I was talking about

Immediately after taking my sleep medicine on Friday night, I became extremely dizzy.  The room started spinning.  It is terrifying to live alone when you're chronically ill but even worse when you are sick upon sic.

I don't know what to do but to keep the cell phone close.  I text 2 friends to let them know I'm very sick and I'm not sure what's wrong.

Then I called the on call doctor at my doctor's office but the call didn't go through.

I tried to walk to the living room chair very slowly.

The body wide pain is even more excruciating then usual and I'm having the sensation that if I fall asleep I either will die in my sleep (that part is o.k.) or the thing that really worries me is that I will fall asleep but wake up paralyzed.  I have had similar sensations as a side effect from Elavil, however with the Elavil I felt and heard a metal sound in my head and my heart raced so fast I thought it would kill me.

I think the saddest part of this story is how I was treated by both the paramedics and the hospital staff.  I told the 911 dispatcher to make absolutely sure that my "purse" goes with me to the hospital.  I can say one or two words but I really can't speak in sentences.  I am so sedated that I can't keep my eyes open.

When the paramedics arrived (I couldn't tell you what they looked like) I pointed to the "purse"  My main concern was that if I were going to die in a damn hospital my journals need to be in the purse, not home because I have not considered myself to have a safe place to live in many years.

The paramedic picks up my purse then puts it back down and decides to leave it at the house even though I insisted.

The paramedics are rude and seems to be mad.  They keep yeling at me to keep my eyes open which I can't.  They keep insisting I tell them the exact date I was last transported in an ambo. which I could not do.

They said "IF YOU DON'T WALK DOWN THESE STEPS YOU ARE GOING TO GET HURT!"

(3 flights of steps that a stretcher can't be carried on)  When they insisted I walk, I grabbed the banister and they said DON'T DO THAT

When I got into the ambulance I was crying from the pain of the electric bp cuff.  The paramedic (a bastard really) kept pinching my arm and holding the pinch as hard as he could.   He said:

"STOP COMPLAINING IT'S JUST A BLOOD PRESSURE CUFF" (yEAH and he doesn't have lyme and fibromyalgia)   Anytime I did not provide an articulate answer he held a pinch to my left arm.  I said please that'x excruciating please don't pinch me. 

He said "Well, then you need to cooperate"

He wondered why I was "crying" and I told him the bp cuffe was excruciating.  I kept complaining about what felt like convulsions and electricity in my body.  He said that my bp is very high.  (well I don't know what you want me to do about that it is normally low/normal)

When we got to the hospital, I was put in what appeared to be some sort of overflow room.  I rarely saw any hospital staff.  I told the nurse I needed to go to the bathroom but I can't walk their by myself.

She said "WALK BY YOURSELF OR DON'T GO"

She also said "You either go by yourself or I'm not going to triage you
"
I "collapsed" in a chair and never made it to the toilet.  She kept good on her threat and "punished" me by not triaging me for at least another 2 hours.  I was in the overflow room until 4 a.m.  When the doc saw me he said he has no idea what the matter is, gave me a med.

Sends nurse into the room.  She hands me a stack of papers while I am supine.  I asked her if she could put it with my coat, and she initially refused looking at me like: "How dare you tell me what to do with the paperwork"

I was asked if I had money for a cab.  I said well for one thing I insisted they bring my purse but they elected to ignore me so no I do not have money.  She looked at me like:

She was going to keep me in the hospital indefinitely since I have no ride home.  After 2 hours they called me an ambulance and I was home by 7:30 a.m.  I have a significant bruise on my arm from the guy who kept pinching me.

The hospital here in mountain town have a horrible reputation and I have been told repeatedly whatever you do don't EVER HAVE SURGERY AT MOUNTAIN TOWN HOSPITAL YOU WILL REGRET IT.

"Allergic"

"Electro-hypersensitivity"

I discovered to day that this is the word that describes me to a tee.  And it means:

"Allergic to every aspect of modern society"

"How to watch true crime shows"

When I first got cable, I was ridiculously addicted to the true crime shows for about 2 weeks that was practically all I watched.  However, I noticed changes in my breathing and heartbeat as well as nightmares.

Now, although I do still watch the ID channel, I do so in moderation.  For example once or twice a week.  The other trick is, that as your last show of the evening you watch:

Big Bang Theory
The Little Couple

or

Honey Boo Boo for example

anything that makes you smile, makes you happy so you can end your t.v. watching evening with your spirits in a good place.

"Visiting the new medical marijuana dispensary"

So, the staff were fabulous and very very friendly and knowledgeable.  They had me fill out a variety of paperwork and disclaimers.  I had to agree to not operate a motorized vehicle!

I said to the clerk that "it is a very gray area and how on earth are authorities going to enforce it when

"marijuana is your medicine, and a car is your mode of transport!"

I told the clerk that I've tried mmj in 4 different forms, and while sometimes temporarily relaxing it has done nothing to lessen the everpresent excruciating pain.

She recommended "granddaddy purple" and let me smell it as well as other strains.  I looked at the prices of items and mmj is quite costly.  I did not have enough money to make a purchase, however I do still have a "caretaker" who this far has been my "supplier"  (SOUNDS SO ILLICIT!)  In the end I feel the best bet would be staying with edibles because of my sensitive lungs.

I will keep you informed!

"Modern MADNESS"

The whole technology thing is complete madness.  For example, I joined an org a month ago, then needed to ask a question.  Although they have a website there was no phone # provided.  I tried for a whole month to reach them.  I can't even find a snail mail address on them.  There website has a section called "help/contact us"

I tried multiple times over a period of weeks however there was a pop up that said "this section can't be used unless cookies are enabled"

(Nobody at the library knew how to help so I had to cancel my membership)

Also, I have been trying for well over 6 months to get my pics from my camera onto a flash drive as a small step toward moving forward with my photo dreams.  Nobody seems to know how to do this as there is no memory card on my model phone.

After many months of asking folks to help me I've gotten nowhere.  It turns out I have to find someone who owns an android phone AND a computer who has a great deal of tech knowledge before I can accomplish this.

One of the goals (with the 600 pics) is to create a photo blog or photo website.  Getting nowhere.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday I tried to change my address with social security over the telephone. After waiting 21 minutes for a rep to help me I gave up and hung up the phone.

Today I called again.  The automaton stated that: THERE WILL BE APPROXIMATELY A 23 MINUTE WAIT FOR A REPRESENTATIVE.

So, here I am at the library I just tried to go on the ssa gov website to change my address.  I tried 3x.  Each time the computer
"told me"

"WE ARE SORRY BUT WE ARE UNABLE TO VERIFY YOUR IDENTITY!"

sO, now I will go onto google , get the snail mail address for ssa and send an old fashioned letter.

About 1/2 of the time at least I would have to say this all this modern technology seems to lower quality of life, not raise it.

"Welcome to last week's international blog audience!"

Ahhh!  Brings me great joy to see this past weeks list of readers in:

TORONTO
NASHVILLE
GREEN BAY WISCONSIN
MADRID
SUNNYVALE, CA
GARLAND, TEX
PINEGROVE, PA
COLUMBIA FALLS, MAINE
STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN
MANCHESTER, U.K.
N.Y. N.Y.
MARBELLA, ANDALUCIA, SPAIN
NEW DELHI, IN
CONNEAUT, OH
HOWELL, MI
OIN ATTIKI GREECE
DALLAS, TEX
COLORADO SPRINGS, CO
SYDNEY, NSWALES
L.A.
BRUSSELS, BELGIUM
CAROL STREAM, ILL
MILFORD, NEW HAMPSHIRE
SIMI VALLEY, CA
STOCKHOM, SWEDEN
MILAN, ITALY
DALLAS, TEX
WEYMOUTH, MASS
PEGNONE, LIGURIA, ITALY
SAN JOSE, CA
FLAG AZ
ROCKPORT, MASS
ORLANDO, FL
DURHAM, NC
BESSEMER, AL
COLUMBUS, OH
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA
CHICAGO ILLINOIS

WELCOME TO MY INTERNATIONAL TABLE AND KEEP COMING BACK!

"New York Times/Vietnam Legacy"

This article was essentially about how Vietnam vets left Amer-Asian babies behind that they never got to meet.  There are THOUSANDS of kids who never got to meet their parents.

"I need to know where I come from.  Without him, (father) I DON'T EXIST" says Trinh Tran, 46, on her inability to find her bio. father.

author comment- (me) I'm "lucky" in that, even before meeting my bio. parents I never felt like I lacked identity, never felt any kind of lowered self esteem-but I do know that statistically speaking-folks who don't meet their bio. parents in many cases have a tough life.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Betsy, from Breaking Amish has now met her wonderful , loving and accepting maternal grandmother.  Betsy now feels like she knows who she is, and she can move forward in her life.  Identity is a big deal it seems ;)

"Look out it's RESTAURANT TAKEOVER!"

Today I went to Dennys.  Normally I only go once a year for the free birthday breakfast but today I went because I knew that it was a do-able walk from the bus stop.

When I walked in, there were 2 folks in front of me waiting to be seated.  Instead of the "hostess" saying:

"How many in your party?" (to the man who was first in line)  She said: "Three?  Two?  One?!"

She sat me at a dirty table.  I was brought water in a chipped glass and coffee in a dirty mug.  The manager checked on me and I said: "this is not a good start! THIS IS SCARY!  Have you ever seen restaurant takeover I asked?  Yes, I do watch that show; he said.

The waitress came over in the middle of the comment and looked panicked.  She interrupted saying:  "what's wrong?"  (I didn't find it necessary to repeat the same thing to her, plus I didn't want her to feel blamed)

The manager quickly rectified the problem.  After brekkie arrived, the waitress intuitively asked me if I would like an extra plate.  (I did)

She brings me a plate that looked like it was out of the dirty dishes!  I call over the manager quietly.  I said," look at this please.  will you touch this plate?"  He seemed to be too afraid to touch it!  I said: "I'm alerting you because I do not want the waitress to feel like I am blaming her"

He takes the plate to the back and she says:

"OH MY GOD"

(Oh my god is right.  I am concerned for food safety and I will not go back.)

I consider not tipping her. But, she was in the restroom and I said: "This looks like a really tough place to work, and you are understaffed.
"

She said "We are understaffed, it's a very hard place to work, and I have some things going on in my personal life too" (she begins to cry)

me-"Well, you have a compassionate customer here"  "Have you ever seen restaurant takeover?"

her-"I sure have, she smiles.......and if they came here we would be in deep shit!"

I decide in the end even though I feel mad, to give her a fat tip.................................because I have done that kind of work/and I know we live in the land of low wage work.......................................

"Quoted"

Bea Arthur from Golden Girls to her roommate:

"All the single men under 80 in this city are crack dealers!"

(When I heard this I realized that not much has changed over the decades)

Medical Marijuana

So things change minute by minute in this country with the whole mmj debate so I am always learning.  When I contacted the naturopath who initially approved my getting a card, she said that she is not permitted to prescribe or help the patient find the right dosing.  Dissapointing, I am essentially on my own.

9/11 on my mind

I watched 3 hours of specials on 9/11 over the weekend.  They were in depth looks, never before seen footage and lengthy interviews with survivors, paramedics and the like.   It was heartbreaking and very educational.  I'd post the shows however currently blogger no longers re-posts from you tube etc. ;(  I heard that there was an attack on the wtc in February 93 and if officials had done better follow through then 9/11 would likely never have happened.

This is not much of a surprise in that "they" say that the overwhelming majority of "accidents" of any type could have been prevented with a little bit of common sense.

On 9/11/2011 I was supposed to have gone to my second day at the temp. job.  However I was told not to go because the job was near a military base.  Also Baltimore county told me that they can't give me the security deposit they had promised me due to the attack.

The combination of these factors likely contributed to my next homeless episode because the landlords were not willing to wait any longer for the sec. deposit.

On 8/1/2011 I found an apt. to rent in a huge mansion in Roland Park and it seemed life was looking up.  When 9/11 happened it was like, well doesn't that just figure.  It felt like life would change a lot-and as we all know America has been forever changed.

My thoughts and condolences to everyone still affected by 9/11

"wHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE"

This show proves that there isn't a boring ancestry story on this planet!  Last night was featured Jim Parsons, best known as Dr. Sheldon Cooper on the Big Bang Theory.

First of all when he said he is 40 y.o. I just about fell off my rocker, because he looks 25.  He finds first of all that he has French Louisiana roots. 

I did not write down the names of his ancestors so I will comment on the show as I remember it.  His one ancestor got published and was a founder of modern medicine as we know it!  He got published at 44 (same age as I did) then shortly thereafter died in a boat fire.

My sentiments about life, death and longevity are similar to parsons who said in essence: "Although it is a shame he died young, he got this newspaper write up which honored him as a human being and for his contributions.  What else really matters in life but to make your positive mark on the world and be remember in such a positive way?"

He also discovers that his French ancestors  were elite architects.  One was marble supplier to the king and one was architect to the king.  Wow!  Parsons enjoys this link immensely since he is also a very successful artist/actor.

This show is probably ultimately leading to many new members of ancestry.com

;)

"Surviving as a car-less American"

The pedestrian, auto, bicycle mix is often a very dangerous one.  And, there are regular close calls daily even if you are hyper aware and using good judgement.  Most of these interactions are unpleasant to say the least.

Today, however, I'm going to share a little snippet of my pedestrian day that will likely bring a smile to your face as it did mine.

I've come up with a variety of ways to try to keep myself in one piece.  And I have come up with many many uses for an umbrella !

It is not uncommon for Mountain town cyclists to completely make up their own rules of the road.  Most travel fast on sidewalks highly endangering pedestrians.

 Today, even though the cyclist was on the road/he was about ready to run the red which means he would have hit me in the ped. walkway.

I held out my closed umbrella, completely straight as if it were a gate that comes down when the trains come-which forced the cyclist to stop!  He smiled and said in a good natured way: "GREAT BLOCK!"

"Breaking Amish"

So, you already know that my favorite part of yesterday's episode was Betsy learning about her bio. parents and ancestry.  ;)

Mexican heritage-interesting that she now knows why she is unlike most Amish, and loves Mexican food!

AND her ancestor Abigail who looks just like her got accused of witchcraft at the Salem witch trials!  wow!  How neat that Betsy feels even more ready for the future in that she has an even clearer sense of her identity!

Sam loses his virginity with Betsy?!  I didn't c that "cumming!" (pun intended)

So neat that Matt has professionals willing to back him in his efforts to move forward as a designer.  He and Iva have shown great courage pursuing their professional dreams IN THE NEW WORLD!

I'm EXTREMELY surprised that the kids are going back home soon (where they grew up) and that seems terrifying!

Do you think Chapel will take Andrew back?  That would surprise me.

"Trapped"

Oddly, due to Mountain Town's extremely difficult and weird climate I frequently become homebound.  Sometimes only get out every other day, or only for a couple of hours a day since i'm unable to walk:

on ice

 in electrical storms

through snow banks

and the like!

  It really sucks to get trapped at home in the Spring and Summer months!

One would expect to get trapped at home every now and again in winter-but we have had 9 straight weeks of rain, flooding and electrical storms sometimes lasting 12 hours! (Mountain Town had the most extreme summer weather in the duration of record keeping)

It sucks-it's really tough.

There is a city I'm drawn to whose winters  are easy-however  if I move there I will lose my rental subsidy which puts me at risk for another episode of homelessness.  ;(

Quality of life is still extremely poor and I seriously doubt that it will improve enough for me to deem it "acceptable"

But, I'm betting those of you who know that I'm coming into my 20'th years of extreme poverty probably also doubt that things will get better for me.

"Breaking Amish"

Wow, that was not very nice to leave Devon in Las Vegas.  Feeling abandoned is not a nice thinkg.  Did they leave him there because of his threesome?  If so, that's ridiculous. 

So, Sam has to leave Iva, i wonder what his job is and whether it's back in his Amish Community?  How will he go back without getting shunned?  I'm glad he forgave Iva for "cheating"

I like lots of curse words/but i do not like them saying "grow some balls" or "douche bag"  i think these are some pretty tastely phrases.

I'm stunned that Sam threatened to blind Devon!!  WTF?!

I feel excited for these kids when they go off to work on their career stuff. The sewing, designing, baking, it's really neat to see thse kids coming of age.

Surf lessons, wow!

How interesting that Richard* (Abe's brother?) was allowed to come to l.a. yet has to go back to punxy to see his p.o.!  Odd.

So adorable to see Samuel dancing and shouting out affirmations.  So glad he and Lizzie are back together!  But him saying to this stranger that he is tired of being a virgin!  What a moment!

How sweet for them to give her a baby shower.  AFter Matt made the little boy outfit, i wondered if he remembered to sew in snaps so the child's diaper can be changed?!

I do not understand how the "kids" had the power to evict Devon.  And I don't understand why they are so angry with him.  Almost every cast member has shown their ugly side and i do not see how Devon is any worse then anyone else!

"Modern day cable t.v."

Yes, i do take in some comedy sitcoms like everybody loves raymond and big bang and those older shows that i never watched when they were in their heyday.

But what i want to comment on is true crime, true t.v. and "reality t.v."

I believe that shows like

investigationdiscovery.com

dateline msnbc

hotel impossible

restaurant impossible

bar takeover

locked up raw

drugs inc.

and good ol'

Honey boo boo

Nancy Grace

are opening people's eyes to tremendous diversity-everything from life is solitary confinement in prison-to an endearing look into the lives of "redneck families" like honey boo boo.  It's funny how t.v. can endear us to so many real life people so different from "us"  living their every day lives. 

What I love about shows like hotel impossible and restaurant impossible, is that I notice lots of detail in restaurants as well as the motels I've stayed in-and now these shows are confirming my experiences that there is more dysfunction and gross negligence then there are "healthy" places.

"Who do you think you are"

Boy it was neat to watch Trisha yearwood do her family tree.  You may recall that shortly after i completed the search for my own biological parents, i found out that one of my relatives was in prison for white collar crime!  So, wow this was neat.  And that Samuel got his life back on trac after being threatened with hanging!

This is such an inspiring show.

"Feel better then usual"

I've continued to experiment with the medical marijuana and most of the time i notice no difference for the better at all.  Today the pain is lessened in my severely problematic right shoulder neck and arm, also walking wasn't as painful today.  Hoping it is the mmj that made me feel better and hoping i'll have more good days.

I found a stray frisbee today there was a group of 4 playing and the frisbee ended up near me.  So, i threw it back and then joined in the game without asking!  They didn't have to ask, they just included me automatically.  Guess i played for 10 or 15 minutes when their game ended and i was absolutely stunned that i was able to play and actually b good at it like i used to.

This may be no big deal for the average person, but for me, who is so crippled up most of the time, it is huge.  Twas very joyful.

I will keep u informed.

"Observed"

Today, as soon as i stepped outside, i noticed roofers working on a nearby building.  The song piping out of their radio?  "Freefalling, i'm freefalling!"